Last Friday night, I went to see a rapper named MC Chris. He's one of my favorites, and if you haven't heard it, his album "Life's a Bitch and I'm Her Pimp" is available to freely download from his website. If you like good hip-hop, good humor, Star Wars, or any combination of the above, I highly recommend his music. At the show, I got his new record "Eating's not Cheating" (which is conspicuously unsigned...) and I'm enjoying it immensely.

The show was in a moderately large venue, the same place I’d seen Mr. Quintron and Miss Pussycat a few months earlier, and was sold out at five hundred people. The room was less oppressive than the other times I’d been there because due to Mc Chris’s extreme asthma, there was no smoking allowed in the venue. When you hear his voice you’ll understand. And yes, he is a full-grown man.

MC Chris walked onto the stage with a Rebel Alliance t-shirt and a wireless mic, DJ Fewell plugged in his Powerbook and a wonderful show commenced. The crowd was in motion and MC Chris’s high-pitched rhymes were in full effect. He even graced us with “I Want Candy” from Aqua Teen Hunger Force. For those not in the know, MC Chris does the voice for MC P Pants (you know, the eight-foot spider with the diaper and the hairnet) on Adult Swim’s Aqua Teen Hunger Force.

At one point during the show, those four Rebels I’d consumed (Czech beer, not to be confused with the alliance) had made the rounds and were ready for deploy. I really couldn’t hold it, so I quickly made my way to the men’s room. I stepped to the urinal, and as I was draining the snake, I couldn’t help but notice the guy at the next station. He was about 5’5’’, maybe 110 pounds and was dressed like Jon Bon Jovi. His pants were so tight, you could almost make out the numbers on the credit card he had in his back pocket, and his medium-length, and carefully disheveled hair was dyed blue-black. He looked ridiculous.

I’m trying to finish my business and get back to the show when another guy walks into the bathroom and makes for the stall. He takes one look at the little rock star and says in this great, bellowing, drunken frat-boy tone, “How long it take you to squeeze into those jeans, Stamos?”

My first assumption was that this frat- guy was a friend of mini-Stamos here and was just giving him a hard time, but mini-Stamos turned to me with this perplexed look on his face and I realize that he was waiting for me to acknowledge this frat- guy as one of my friends. I’m fighting the urge to laugh at this point, which is made worse but the fact that the frat-guy is now in the stall, peeing very loudly and making noises like “aaaaahhh” and “oooooooooh.”

Drunk people are funny.